People
Everyone knows people in their life that are from another time or another place but don't see them very often. Maybe you went to school with them. Maybe they are related and live far away. Regardless, these people fall into two categories. Either, you act like no time has passed and you are still the greatest of friends. You spend the time reminiscing and catching up. You show legitimate concern of problems of theirs and issues they have, and they feel the same about you. OR, you have this uncomfortable feeling between yourselves. There is some history or lack of history that leaves a haze over your relationships. One side or the other may show genuine concern, but the other shows an apathy or general distance. Many times, things are said, "How have you been?", or "Still in the same job?", where the answer is a quick yes with little elaboration. More times you don't have much to say at all. You find that you really don't know these people anymore and you're not sure you ever did.
Take my best friend growing up, Al. We had a falling out because of money and a difference of opinion, mainly about my wife's cousin and didn't speak for a couple years over it. We rarely speak now, and its just generic whatever stuff.
Take The best man in my wedding, Elliot. We had a falling out over my wife. I don't really speak to him anymore at all. When I do run into him, its the quick, distant chat.
Look at my brothers and sisters. I was the child that wasn't supposed to be. My next youngest brother was 15 years old when I was born, so that pretty much means I didn't grow up with them. By the time I was old enough to be a responsible adult, they have already been there, done that and we have little in common.
The closest people in my life are my wife, my children and my wife's family and I can't figure out exactly when it happened. Did most of my family and friends just forget about me, did I forget about them, or both? I'm not really sure. There was a time in my life where I wasn't sure when I was gonna eat next or where I was gonna sleep. When I did have a place to sleep, I had little privacy and little more than a rolled up mattress on someones living room floor. It was probably this time where I lost friends. I used some of them until they were tired of me. It was probably this time where I lost touch with family as I was too busy trying to survive to keep in touch.
Regardless of why it happens, it happens. So I guess I can either deal with it and move on or continue to dwell on it further.
Take my best friend growing up, Al. We had a falling out because of money and a difference of opinion, mainly about my wife's cousin and didn't speak for a couple years over it. We rarely speak now, and its just generic whatever stuff.
Take The best man in my wedding, Elliot. We had a falling out over my wife. I don't really speak to him anymore at all. When I do run into him, its the quick, distant chat.
Look at my brothers and sisters. I was the child that wasn't supposed to be. My next youngest brother was 15 years old when I was born, so that pretty much means I didn't grow up with them. By the time I was old enough to be a responsible adult, they have already been there, done that and we have little in common.
The closest people in my life are my wife, my children and my wife's family and I can't figure out exactly when it happened. Did most of my family and friends just forget about me, did I forget about them, or both? I'm not really sure. There was a time in my life where I wasn't sure when I was gonna eat next or where I was gonna sleep. When I did have a place to sleep, I had little privacy and little more than a rolled up mattress on someones living room floor. It was probably this time where I lost friends. I used some of them until they were tired of me. It was probably this time where I lost touch with family as I was too busy trying to survive to keep in touch.
Regardless of why it happens, it happens. So I guess I can either deal with it and move on or continue to dwell on it further.
posted by Mikey at 12:56 PM
1 Comments:
This posting reminded me of what it's like walking through campus. Everyone's conversation goes as follows:
"Hey man, how are you?"
"Good, and yourself?"
"I'm good!"
And that's it... I swear, if I had a dime for everytime I heard the word "good" I wouldn't have to go to school. :P
Anyway man, I learned long ago that people in general come and go as the weather. One day it'll be sunny and bright, the next it'll be rainy and dim. Those days pass by, just like friends of old. But the great thing about life is that nothing really "ends." You just have new beginnings. New friends pop up, even if the old ones linger from time to time. I hope I don't turn into one of those with a haze over our relationship. I hope that I can attend all of your poker tournaments and take your money!
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